My Kryptonite

Recently there has been an internal debate going on inside my mind and my heart. For the past couple of months I have been trying to figure out this strange pull inside of me. I have been trying to figure out whether or not I wanted to stay in Nacogdoches or apply for a Disney Intern or possibly another position, maybe out in the "real world". I still battle with myself about this issue but I think I have come to a conclusion:


I think, right now, I am going to stay in Nacogdoches. I can't leave this town. At least not yet. I have so much to tie my heart to and I think if I uprooted myself from where I have planted my roots I would not be ready and would be lost in a place only "natives" know.


I look around this town and see so much to live for. I look around and see everything that I fell in love with from the SFA campus to Main Street and Banita Creek.


Coaching soccer was one of the best things to happen to me. I've coached The CrazyLegs for 3 seasons now and have loved every minute of it. Yes, sometimes it can be frustrating and stressful but at the end of the day watching the kids faces when they get that goal is worth all the frustration and stress.


There is this little girl, Bella, she is the daughter of one of my regulars at Smoothie King. She is also the sister of one of the little girls I sub-coached for. Any time I see her my entire day is made. She is the cutest little kid. Her and I had a dance-off one time in Smoothie King and it was so much fun. Every time she comes in and I am working she gets this HUGE smile on her face and RUNS in to see me!


Bella is my kryptonite. I know it might sound weird that a 3 year-old little girl is my weakness. But any time I see her I realize there is so much more here than where I am at right now. I have so much potential to be great, here in Nacogdoches. 


Bella, reminds me, every time she comes in, that Nacogdoches is the place for me. At least for the next few years Nacogdoches is just perfect. I want to stay and coach The CrazyLegs and maybe even coach an upper level group of kids and see how that goes. I want to see where certain things in my life are going. I want to give my life here more of a chance.


Yes, right now I have to get Smoothie King back up to par and re-train ALL, yes ALL, of my employees. I have to do this to get from the bottom to the top. I need to build Smoothie King up and train someone who can take my place when I leave. I would love to stay here at Smoothie King for a while but I cannot see myself wanting to work there three years from now.


I really thought I wanted to own it, but I've thought very hard about it and I don't want to do that anymore. I can't do it. I want something better for myself, but I want something here.


Bella, yes, is my kryptonite because when I look or interact with her she reminds me of where my heart truly lies...


Thank you Bella.