The Story of Us

So, here I am, once again blogging :) And you know what I don't care! So what if someone gets upset about when I blog, you know I don't care anymore! I've held on for too long... I thought by now we would have at least talked or figured out what's going on. And we've gotten no where, so I'm going to blog and blog my heart away!

I'm not telling you I'm giving up, I'm telling you I've come to the realization that this between us is over. For right now, at least. I'm not giving up all hope but as of right now I've got to let you go. I can't hold on to you and keep hoping you're going to come around, when it's looking like you're not. If you were really upset or really wanted to be with me I kind of feel like you would have come after me or at least made contact by now. 

So I'm going to let you go and pretend you don't exist right now. I'm going to have fun and not think about how I can fix this. I can't hold on any longer if you aren't going to fight for me. I at least deserve that! I deserve that!

I'm not going to stop loving you, my heart simply has no room for anyone else but I'm getting a sense that you've already kind of made the steps to move on. True love doesn't just come and go but maybe it takes a break. I can't keep thinking this is going to magically get better because it's not. It's something we both have to work on and I've got to learn to be okay with out you. 

Days might get hard but I have the memories and you know what right now those are great memories. I do get a little peeved when you tell me not to do something, like blogging. Blogging is how I cope with things; I sit in front of the screen and just let my fingers do the typing. Asking me not to blog would be like asking you not to paint or draw. I'm not going to ask you to stop doing something that is part of you and that helps you cope or release tension or anger or heartache.

I get that you need time but I thought 3 weeks would have been enough. Maybe I'm the one in the wrong by thinking this would have all been fixed by now. But maybe I at least had hope for us and right now you seem to be lacking in that area.

I've been listening to Taylor Swift's song "The Story of Us" and it has really helped out a lot, I don't know how but it's kind of opened my eyes to the fact that right now is not our time. Only time will tell what is in store. Maybe one day you'll finally realize I was worth it, that you should have fought for me. I hope it's soon.

Now is my time to just let you go and learn what's it's like to be me again with nothing held back.

THE STORY OF US

I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us,
How we met and the sparks flew instantly,
People would say, "They're the lucky ones."
I used to know my place was a spot next to you,
Now I'm searching the room for an empty seat,
'Cause lately I don't even know what page you're on.

Oh, a simple complication,
Miscommunications lead to fall-out.
So many things that I wish you knew,
So many walls that I can't break through.

[Chorus:]
Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.

Next chapter.

How'd we end up this way?
See me nervously pulling at my clothes and trying to look busy,
And you're doing your best to avoid me.
I'm starting to think one day I'll tell the story of us,
How I was losing my mind when I saw you here,
But you held your pride like you should've held me.

Oh, I'm scared to see the ending,
Why are we pretending this is nothing?
I'd tell you I miss you but I don't know how,
I've never heard silence quite this loud.

[Chorus:]
Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.

This is looking like a contest,
Of who can act like they care less,
But I liked it better when you were on my side.
The battle's in your hands now,
But I would lay my armor down
If you said you'd rather love than fight.
So many things that you wished I knew,
But the story of us might be ending soon.

[Chorus:]
Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now, now, now.
And we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate 'cause we're going down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.

The end.